If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#176

James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

#444

When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.

#167

Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

#617

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

#740

Chuck Norris once took LSD just to give his hallucinations a bad trip.

#419

Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

#62

Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.

#182

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#149

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

#153

When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.

#8

Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.