Chuck Norris is the only man who has, literally, beaten the odds. With his fists. 293 345 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 46% approval (638 votes)
There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
Scotty in Star Trek often says "Ye cannae change the laws of physics. This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.
Chuck Norris doesn't need garbage collection because he doesn't call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().
When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.
Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.