Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks. 262 358 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 42% approval (620 votes)
The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.