Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#450

Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.

#269

Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

#158

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

#322

Chuck Norris can taste lies.

#431

Chuck Norris was the orginal sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel.

#430

The Drummer for Def Leppard's only got one arm. Chuck Norris needed a back scratcher.

#575

Each hair in Chuck Norris' beard contributes to make the world's largest DDOS.

#502

Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.

#715

Freddy Krueger has nightmares about Chuck Norris.

#312

Chuck Norris used to play baseball. When Babe Ruth was hailed as the better player, Chuck Norris killed him with a baseball bat to the throat. Lou Gehrig got off easy.

#185

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.