Chuck Norris can spawn threads that complete before they are started. 278 307 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 48% approval (585 votes)
Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.
Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.
The crossing lights in Chuck Norris' home town say "Die slowly" and "die quickly". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.
Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.