Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#406

The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.

#344

Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.

#721

Chuck Norris fought the law, and Chuck Norris won.

#266

How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.

#207

Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#247

Most boots are made for walkin'. Chuck Norris' boots ain't that merciful.

#579

Chuck Norris types with one finger. He points it at the keyboard and the keyboard does the rest.

#492

Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

#744

Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.

#545

Chuck Norris can spawn threads that complete before they are started.

#293

Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.