Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#102

Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.

#104

A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

#95

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

#30

Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.

#127

When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

#454

Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition for each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.

#25

When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.

#118

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.

#106

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

#492

Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.