Chuck Norris can remember the future.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#286

Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#475

In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep. Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus AND the jeep.

#381

Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.

#422

After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

#326

Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

#340

If you were somehow able to land a punch on Chuck Norris your entire arm would shatter upon impact. This is only in theory, since, come on, who in their right mind would try this?

#362

July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#103

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.

#282

Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

#168

The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.