Chuck Norris can remember the future.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#446

In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.

#654

Chuck Norris can dry his hair under water.

#41

Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

#481

Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

#460

Those aren't credits that roll after Walker Texas Ranger. It is actually a list of fatalities that occurred during the making of the episode.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#201

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.

#361

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

#469

Mr. T pities the fool. Chuck Norris rips the fool's head off.

#587

Chuck Norris can speak Braille.