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Roundhouse your way through
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While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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#746
Chuck Norris remembers the future.
#614
Chuck Norris can watch the radio.
#148
Chuck Norris doesnt shave, he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
#376
Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him "a promising Rookie".
#15
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.
#741
Chuck Norris can suck a garden hose through a golf ball.
#308
The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.
#130
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
#413
If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.
#559
With Chuck Norris P = NP. There's no nondeterminism with Chuck Norris decisions.
#24
The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends"
#198
The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.
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