Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#41

Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

#472

Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#529

Chuck Norris can write multi-threaded applications with a single thread.

#731

Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon.

#1

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

#438

TNT was originally developed by Chuck Norris to cure indigestion.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.

#311

Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.

#550

Chuck Norris can compile syntax errors.