Chuck Norris can read a book in his sleep.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#451

When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.

#144

When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.

#187

A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

#161

Archaeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

#702

Chuck Norris finished the neverending story.

#401

Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.

#486

Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.

#505

It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.

#721

Chuck Norris fought the law, and Chuck Norris won.

#588

Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.

#152

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

#320

The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.