One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#91

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

#637

Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

#124

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

#527

No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#494

Chuck Norris doesn't need garbage collection because he doesn't call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().

#618

Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.

#711

What is the last thing that goes through the head of any Chuck Norris victim? His foot.

#685

Chuck Norris CAN count his chickens before they hatch.

#628

Chuck Norris plays pool with comets and astroids. He shoots them into black holes.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#434

For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.