One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#702

Chuck Norris finished the neverending story.

#53

Chuck Norris' database has only one table, 'Kick', which he DROPs frequently.

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

#627

Chuck Norris once pissed in a gas tank of a semi truck as a joke - that truck is now know as Optimus Prime.

#740

Chuck Norris once took LSD just to give his hallucinations a bad trip.

#309

When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

#486

Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.

#600

Chuck Norris causes the Windows Blue Screen of Death.

#466

Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you...Forty seven times.

#443

Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.

#454

Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition for each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.

#179

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.