Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#695

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

#739

Chuck Norris can kill seven with one blow. By literally blowing on them.

#609

Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

#558

Chuck Norris once won a game of connect four in 3 moves.

#404

We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

#420

Sweating bullets is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.

#110

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

#546

Chuck Norris programs do not accept input.

#185

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

#678

The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.

#650

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.