Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#706

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#226

Some kids play Kick the can. Chuck Norris played Kick the keg.

#308

The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.

#647

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

#584

Product Owners never ask Chuck Norris for more features. They ask for mercy.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#593

Chuck Norris can write to an output stream.

#221

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

#246

There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.

#271

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

#464

According to the Bible, God created the universe in six days. Before that, Chuck Norris created God by snapping his fingers.

#439

After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.