Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#732

Chuck Norris hit 11 out of 10 targets, with 9 bullets.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#603

Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.

#504

Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.

#415

Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.

#118

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#467

The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was a game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#584

Product Owners never ask Chuck Norris for more features. They ask for mercy.

#92

Faster than a speeding bullet... More powerful than a locomotive... Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... These are some of Chuck Norris' warm-up exercises.