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After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.
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#665
Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.
#346
MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.
#319
The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.
#33
Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's". Already Been Chucked.
#666
Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.
#254
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
#110
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
#334
With the rising cost of gasoline, Chuck Norris is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
#316
Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.
#167
Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
#629
Chuck Norris can stand on his head. His dick-head.
#285
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
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