When God said, "let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say 'please'.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#277

Brokeback Mountain is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

#688

If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#280

One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

#379

Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.

#435

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn't even come close.

#394

Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.

#497

All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue.

#186

Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#618

Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.

#599

How many Chuck Norris' require to screw a light bulb? None, he will screw it all.