Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it. 336 308 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 52% approval (644 votes)
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
The US did not boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow due to political reasons: Chuck Norris killed the entire US team with a single round-house kick during TaeKwonDo practice.
Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair.
When Chuck Norris break the build, you can't fix it, because there is not a single line of code left.
Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Trivial Pursuit with one roll of the dice, and without answering a single question... just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard.
In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.