When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.

264 249

More Chuck Norris facts

#293

Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#168

The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.

#473

A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#685

Chuck Norris CAN count his chickens before they hatch.

#8

Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

#7

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

#426

Chuck Norris' penis is a third degree blackbelt, and an honorable 32nd-degree mason.

#290

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.

#201

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.