When Chuck Norris works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does. 296 294 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (590 votes)
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.