When Chuck Norris works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does. 298 294 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (592 votes)
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.