There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#584

Product Owners never ask Chuck Norris for more features. They ask for mercy.

#618

Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.

#395

Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.

#389

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

#615

Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

#158

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

#518

Chuck Norris can access private methods.

#737

When Chuck Norris went to college, he told his father "You're the man of the house now".

#230

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

#390

Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.

#302

Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a hole. Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.

#745

Chuck Norris can swim on land.