There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#557

Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.

#366

If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#205

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.

#544

Chuck Norris programs occupy 150% of CPU, even when they are not executing.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#491

Chuck Norris doesn't have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up.

#588

Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.

#562

Chuck Norris eats lightning and shits out thunder.

#138

If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.

#504

Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.