Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#139

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

#361

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

#259

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#588

Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.

#507

Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

#737

When Chuck Norris went to college, he told his father "You're the man of the house now".

#412

Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

#548

Chuck Norris doesn't need an OS.

#554

Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

#651

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.