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Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.
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#145
When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
#372
Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.
#307
Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
#696
When Chuck Norris claps his hands thunder stays quiet.
#504
Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
#658
Chuck Norris can eat one pringle.
#294
Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16. Seconds.
#418
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
#385
The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.
#366
If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch.
#492
Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.
#321
Staring at Chuck Norris for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.
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