Chuck Norris doesn't believe in ravioli. He stuffs a live turtle with beef and smothers it in pig's blood.

303 369

More Chuck Norris facts

#347

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.

#359

Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.

#181

Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly.

#456

The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Chuck Norris, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

#649

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

#557

Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#699

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

#584

Product Owners never ask Chuck Norris for more features. They ask for mercy.

#616

Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.

#452

One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

#283

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.