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Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
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#121
Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.
#665
Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.
#163
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
#130
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
#416
A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.
#618
Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.
#477
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
#598
Chuck Norris doesn't need an account. He just logs in.
#184
Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.
#181
Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly.
#651
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
#730
The reason Superman flies is because he knows Chuck Norris is on the ground.
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