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Roundhouse your way through
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A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
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#9
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this a slow Tuesday.
#422
After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"
#83
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
#78
Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
#415
Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.
#551
Every SQL statement that Chuck Norris codes has an implicit "COMMIT" in its end.
#451
When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.
#395
Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.
#403
In the X-Men movies, none of the X-Men super-powers are done with special effects. Chuck Norris is the stuntman for every character.
#596
Chuck Norris' unit tests don't run. They die.
#743
The moon's shadow doesn't dare follow Chuck Norris.
#488
Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.
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