Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#290

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.

#245

The easiest way to determine Chuck Norris' age is to cut him in half and count the rings.

#72

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

#519

Chuck Norris can instantiate an abstract class.

#699

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

#249

Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

#83

Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#643

Chuck Norris can milk ground beef from a cow.

#62

Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.

#311

Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.