Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#737

When Chuck Norris went to college, he told his father "You're the man of the house now".

#545

Chuck Norris can spawn threads that complete before they are started.

#472

Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.

#365

Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.

#425

There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

#362

July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.

#575

Each hair in Chuck Norris' beard contributes to make the world's largest DDOS.

#345

Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean.

#221

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

#649

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

#435

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn't even come close.

#557

Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.