In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#568

Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.

#714

When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.

#456

The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Chuck Norris, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

#145

When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.

#365

Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.

#426

Chuck Norris' penis is a third degree blackbelt, and an honorable 32nd-degree mason.

#170

You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.

#245

The easiest way to determine Chuck Norris' age is to cut him in half and count the rings.

#507

Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

#221

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#88

Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.