When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it's across the room.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#9

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this a slow Tuesday.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#706

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#709

Chuck Norris can rip a page out of Facebook.

#451

When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.

#62

Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.

#198

The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.

#249

Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

#82

When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

#652

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

#225

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

#360

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.