When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it's across the room.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#385

The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.

#612

There is no April 1st in Chuck Norris' calendar, because no one can fool him.

#31

Chuck Norris' sperm is so badass, he had sex with Nicole Kidman, and 7 months later she prematurely gave birth to a Ford Excursion.

#505

It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.

#280

One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

#414

Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.

#158

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#318

He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.

#651

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

#155

On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.