Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag. 330 314 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 51% approval (644 votes)
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.
Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
What many people dont know is Chuck Norris is the founder of planned parenthood. Not even unborn children can escape his wrath.
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.
Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.