There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up. 284 322 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 47% approval (606 votes)
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.