There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up. 282 322 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 47% approval (604 votes)
Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.
Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.