Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill. 330 306 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 52% approval (636 votes)
Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.
Scientifically speaking, it is impossible to charge Chuck Norris with obstruction of justice. This is because even Chuck Norris cannot be in two places at the same time.
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.
Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.
It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.