Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#369

Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.

#8

Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.

#457

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.

#721

Chuck Norris fought the law, and Chuck Norris won.

#542

Chuck Norris insists on strongly-typed programming languages.

#690

Chuck Norris caught a bullet by blinking.

#372

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

#477

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

#602

Chuck Norris can make a class that is both abstract and final.

#222

Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.

#150

Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

#684

Chuck Norris can see ultra-violet light.