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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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#319
The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.
#79
Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.
#336
Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.
#243
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
#179
Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
#239
If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
#647
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
#75
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
#262
That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.
#614
Chuck Norris can watch the radio.
#392
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
#558
Chuck Norris once won a game of connect four in 3 moves.
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