#616 If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
#620 Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.
#622 The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.
#629 MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips. Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
#630 Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.