The Internet's Chuck Norris Archive

Hundreds of facts.
One man.
Zero weaknesses.

Vote on the legends, save your favorites, make a meme, or let fate choose your next roundhouse.

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Fact of the Day

October 18, 2026

Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

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Today's Fact Battle

Which Chuck fact wins?

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them. VS Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

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The Rankings

682 Facts

601

Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.

602

If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.

603

Chuck Norris' log statements are always at the FATAL level.

604

The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.

605

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

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606

Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.

607

Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.

608

Chuck Norris died before 20 years, Death doesn't have the courage to tell him yet.

609

When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.

610

Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.

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611

Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.

612

Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.

613

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

614

The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.

615

Chuck Norris can compile syntax errors.

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