Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#728

Chuck Norris has won the lifetime achievement award...twice.

#120

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

#406

The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.

#491

Chuck Norris doesn't have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up.

#88

Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

#30

Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.

#486

Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#15

Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.

#411

When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

#445

Chuck Norris is not Irish. His hair is soaked in the blood of his victims.