Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#665

Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.

#489

When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it's across the room.

#350

Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.

#515

To Chuck Norris, everything contains a vulnerability.

#532

There is no Esc key on Chuck Norris' keyboard, because no one escapes Chuck Norris.

#701

Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.

#153

When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#81

There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#372

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

#182

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.