#586 Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
#587 If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.
#589 Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.
#592 If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
#598 Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.