The Internet's Chuck Norris Archive

Hundreds of facts.
One man.
Zero weaknesses.

Vote on the legends, save your favorites, make a meme, or let fate choose your next roundhouse.

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Fact of the Day

October 18, 2026

Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

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Today's Fact Battle

Which Chuck fact wins?

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them. VS Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

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The Rankings

682 Facts

211

Chuck Norris solved the Travelling Salesman problem in O(1) time. Here's the pseudo-code: Break salesman into N pieces. Kick each piece to a different city.

212

Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.

213

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

214

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

215

Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

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216

Sweating bullets is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.

217

You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.

218

Chuck Norris does not need a watch, he decides what time it is.

219

Chuck Norris understands every definition in the Oxford Thesaurus, except one - "mercy".

220

Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.

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221

Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.

222

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

223

Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".

224

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

225

Chuck Norris invented the internet, just so he had a place to store his porn.

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