When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

276 327

More Chuck Norris facts

#357

Chuck Norris can win a game of Trivial Pursuit with one roll of the dice, and without answering a single question... just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard.

#588

Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.

#213

It's widely believed that Jesus was Chuck Norris' stunt double for crucifixion due to the fact that it is impossible for nails to pierce Chuck Norris' skin.

#42

Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".

#395

Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.

#484

Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.

#198

The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

#102

Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.

#393

When in a bar, you can order a drink called a "Chuck Norris". It is also known as a "Bloody Mary", if your name happens to be Mary.

#18

Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.