Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#708

Chuck Norris died years ago, but the grim reaper can’t pick up the courage to tell him.

#110

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

#405

The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.

#536

Chuck Norris went out of an infinite loop.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#75

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

#321

Staring at Chuck Norris for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.

#356

When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.

#297

Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.

#688

If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.

#341

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.