Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#626

Chuck Norris doesn't need a keyboard he tells the computer to write something and it does.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#589

Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.

#671

The wind is Chuck Norris breathing.

#170

You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.

#219

The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.

#421

Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.

#192

Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.

#236

In a recent survey it was discovered the 94% of American women lost their virginity to Chuck Norris. The other 6% were incredibly fat or ugly.

#359

Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.

#246

There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.

#625

Chuck Norris understands every definition in the Oxford Thesaurus, except one - "mercy".