When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down. 302 269 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 53% approval (571 votes)
It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.
Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.
When Arnold says "I'll be back" in Terminator movie it is implied that he's going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.