The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#107

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... A suicide.

#349

The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.

#214

Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.

#126

There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

#186

Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#643

Chuck Norris can milk ground beef from a cow.

#571

The Chuck Norris Eclipse plugin made alien contact.

#740

Chuck Norris once took LSD just to give his hallucinations a bad trip.

#127

When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

#711

What is the last thing that goes through the head of any Chuck Norris victim? His foot.

#342

Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.