The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#344

Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.

#666

Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.

#604

Code runs faster when Chuck Norris watches it.

#387

Think of a hot woman. Chuck Norris did her.

#269

Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

#685

Chuck Norris CAN count his chickens before they hatch.

#597

Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.

#42

Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".

#404

We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

#318

He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.

#66

If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.

#470

Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.