Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#133

When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

#472

Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.

#243

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

#673

Chuck Norris can tie his shoe while running.

#333

Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.

#386

Chuck Norris' credit cards have no limit. Last weekend, he maxed them out.

#507

Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#447

Chuck Norris' dick is so big, it has it's own dick, and that dick is still bigger than yours.

#358

182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.

#679

Chuck Norris understands women.

#564

No one has ever pair-programmed with Chuck Norris and lived to tell about it.