When Chuck Norris went to college, he told his father "You're the man of the house now".

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More Chuck Norris facts

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#269

Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

#171

Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.

#90

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

#259

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.

#691

Chuck Norris is Simon Cowell's judge.

#347

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.

#666

Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.

#31

Chuck Norris' sperm is so badass, he had sex with Nicole Kidman, and 7 months later she prematurely gave birth to a Ford Excursion.

#615

Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.