In the Words of Julius Caesar, "Veni, Vidi, Vici, Chuck Norris". Translation: I came, I saw, and I was roundhouse-kicked inthe face by Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#195

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

#82

When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

#603

Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.

#677

Chuck Norris doesn't listen to heavy metal, he eats it for breakfast.

#33

Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's". Already Been Chucked.

#425

There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

#630

There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.

#480

In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.

#231

Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.

#297

Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.

#596

Chuck Norris' unit tests don't run. They die.

#108

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.