Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#432

Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

#639

Chuck Norris can lock a safe and keep the key inside it.

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#315

The phrase 'balls to the wall' was originally conceived to describe Chuck Norris entering any building smaller than an aircraft hangar.

#68

Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

#109

What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe.

#672

Chuck Norris can laugh with a straight face.

#531

Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.

#290

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.

#601

Chuck Norris can download emails with his pick-up.

#293

Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.

#471

Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.