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Chuck Norris won the Tour de France with a stationary bicycle.
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#511
Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
#448
They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
#617
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
#111
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
#220
Chuck Norris doesn't play god. Playing is for children.
#254
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
#405
The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.
#210
Chuck Norris does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
#624
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
#743
The moon's shadow doesn't dare follow Chuck Norris.
#87
The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.
#696
When Chuck Norris claps his hands thunder stays quiet.
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