Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#383

Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.

#483

Chuck Norris describes human beings as "a sociable holder for blood and guts".

#442

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

#474

Chuck Norris' favorite cereal is Kellogg's Nails 'N' Gravel.

#360

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#554

Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

#165

Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in thirty-seven seconds.

#205

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.

#496

Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble.

#685

Chuck Norris CAN count his chickens before they hatch.