Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#4

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger. By yelling "Bang!"

#615

Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

#324

One time, Chuck Norris accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Ohio.

#118

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

#603

Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.

#412

Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

#664

To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Chuck Norris.

#401

Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.

#117

Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

#524

Chuck Norris is actually the front man for Apple. He let's Steve Jobs run the show when he's on a mission. Chuck Norris is always on a mission.

#731

Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon.