Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris. 252 311 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 45% approval (563 votes)
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.
When Chuck Norris break the build, you can't fix it, because there is not a single line of code left.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.