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Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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#368
The First rule of Chuck Norris is: you do not talk about Chuck Norris.
#395
Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.
#553
Chuck Norris does not code in cycles, he codes in strikes.
#399
In a tagteam match, Chuck Norris was teamed with Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. He pinned all 3 at the same time.
#689
Chuck Norris once bought Chicago pizza in Seattle.
#102
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
#286
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.
#59
Champions eat wheaties for breakfast. Chuck Norris eats champions for breakfast.
#440
Chuck Norris runs on batteries. Specifically, Die Hards.
#15
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.
#722
Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.
#659
Chuck Norris' cat has 10 lives.
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