Chuck Norris finished the neverending story. 294 306 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 49% approval (600 votes)
As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.
After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.