Chuck Norris doesn't play god. Playing is for children.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#282

Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

#54

Chuck Norris' programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.

#31

Chuck Norris' sperm is so badass, he had sex with Nicole Kidman, and 7 months later she prematurely gave birth to a Ford Excursion.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#467

The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was a game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.

#388

A man once claimed Chuck Norris kicked his ass twice, but it was promptly dismissed as false - no one could survive it the first time.

#546

Chuck Norris programs do not accept input.

#18

Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

#734

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#381

Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.

#159

Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.

#743

The moon's shadow doesn't dare follow Chuck Norris.